Posts Tagged ‘truth’

Defeating Fear

Thursday, November 1st, 2018

by Susan Stanton
October 30, 2018

We are facing a crisis of fear in the world, playing out in many ways on many platforms. And trying to keep fear at bay in the current environment is challenging as we are subjected on a daily basis to horrific reports of violence, destruction and hatred along with an accompanying onslaught of images, sounds and threats—and outright encouragement– of anger and hostility. All this is in part designed to create and sustain fear in order to further the assorted goals of the fear mongers. Exaggeration and distraction are important tactics used by those who wish to advance their own agendas, and are employed manipulatively and without compunction. It is not unreasonable to worry that our most valuable resources and revered institutions are at risk as civil discourse struggles to survive. In short, fear has been weaponized.

Things can seem quite grim. But don’t be disheartened. We have a not-so-secret power of our own, and we need to access it and appreciate its influence and hold it and sustain it and share it.

The antidote to fear is love.

………………………….

As Martin Luther King said, “Darkness cannot drive out darkness, only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate, only love can do that.”

Fear cannot defeat fear. But love can defeat fear.

The pros and cons of marijuana

Monday, April 30th, 2018

Erez Batat writes:

Whenever I read a blog about cannabis, I feel like I am watching a presidential debate with only one candidate.
The blog will either demand to legalize the plant due to its magical properties, or will list the horrific impact it will have on society.

As always, the truth is neither here nor there. I never smoked weed in my youth; in fact, I judged those who did, which made them hide it from me. I got high for the first time when I was 35, and was immediately intrigued with the effect it had on my mind. So, I documented it in my journal.

Here is a simple breakdown of what I learned from a few years of occasional use of pot. I hope it will help demystify the ambiguity around the plant, especially amidst the increasing legalization we are experiencing (it is now recreationally legal in Colorado and Washington states).

More.

6 lessons in happiness from one of the happiest nations in the world

Friday, April 13th, 2018

Natalie Matushenko writes:

I share what I have learned about being happy over the past six years in the hope that it will help others reflect on the changes we can all make to be happier in our lives.

Here’s what I’ve learned:

Read more

The Real Causes Of Depression Have Been Discovered, And They’re Not What You Think

Monday, March 12th, 2018

Johann Hari, author most recently of Lost Connections: Uncovering the Real Causes of Depression – and the Unexpected Solutions, writes:

The more I investigated depression and anxiety, the more I found that, far from being caused by a spontaneously malfunctioning brain, depression and anxiety are mostly being caused by events in our lives. If you find your work meaningless and you feel you have no control over it, you are far more likely to become depressed. If you are lonely and feel that you can’t rely on the people around you to support you, you are far more likely to become depressed. If you think life is all about buying things and climbing up the ladder, you are far more likely to become depressed. If you think your future will be insecure, you are far more likely to become depressed. I started to find a whole blast of scientific evidence that depression and anxiety are not caused in our skulls, but by the way many of us are being made to live. There are real biological factors, like your genes, that can make you significantly more sensitive to these causes, but they are not the primary drivers.

And that led me to the scientific evidence that we have to try to solve our depression and anxiety crises in a very different way (alongside chemical anti-depressants, which should of course remain on the table).

To do that, we need to stop seeing depression and anxiety as an irrational pathology, or a weird misfiring of brain chemicals. They are terribly painful – but they make sense. Your pain is not an irrational spasm. It is a response to what is happening to you. To deal with depression, you need to deal with its underlying causes. On my long journey, I learned about seven different kinds of anti-depressants – ones that are about stripping out the causes, rather than blunting the symptoms. Releasing your shame is only the start.

More.

What almost dying taught Tracy White about living

Monday, February 12th, 2018

I thought I was leading the “right life”—prestigious college, fancy job in New York City, kind husband, happy child, good friends, nice house…then I got incurable cancer.
The doctor thought I had 15 months to get my affairs in order.

When bad stuff happens to us, even the most enlightened can’t help but ask, “Why me?” I just wanted to understand—why did I get cancer? I needed to believe the cancer was happening for a reason.

Now, two years later—after a no-holds-barred healing journey that blended conventional, alternative, and woo-woo treatments—I was beginning to understand the “why me” part.

One reason I got sick was I was living the wrong life.

More.

MY TIMELY NOVEL (CREATIVE NONFICTION), READING THE SIGNS: A PARANORMAL LOVE STORY

Sunday, January 14th, 2018

MY NOVEL–
READING THE SIGNS: A PARANORMAL LOVE STORY

Ted Jones, campus chaplain and English Professor in downtown Denver, doesn’t need more problems. His life has been full of them. More than a few of the clergy seem to think of the church as a sex club, and those who administer the English Department are vipers. Yet, at the beseeching of the spirit of an old woman who appears floating near the stained glass window of St. Elizabeth’s Catholic Church, Ted soon becomes involved with Sharon, the deceased woman’s grown granddaughter.

Damaged though she is, Sharon responds, trying to return the steadfast love that Ted offers. After her grandmother died, she lost that capacity in herself and couldn’t find it in any of the people who professed to love her.

Although Sharon and Ted’s trials are multiple, their love forms the crux of the novel. Such love reaches beyond time and space as we normally conceive them, to involve intersecting planes of existence that touch both past and future.

*******
While fiction, and centrally a love story, it is essentially true. My experiences teaching at CU Denver and the Episcopal Cathedral stick very close to the facts. In light of the current #MeToo movement it is most timely.

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The novel ends with a vision of meeting Sharon on the fields of eternity:

For a moment, my earthly sight blurred with tears, I glimpsed Sharon and me. We stood on fields of gold, there, where chronos meets kairos, and earthly time rolls into eternity.

Link to Amazon Reading the Signs page. Here you can examine the cover and read some pages of the book.

Signed copies are also available from me. See WRITING page of this site.

Surviving the holidays after we’ve broken up with our mothers.

Sunday, December 24th, 2017

This article is by Justin Haley Phillips and centers on a woman’s view, but I know from personal experience that men sometimes have to break up with their mothers too. If a parent is so toxic that you can no longer have contact, then you must distance yourself, female or male.
–Thomas Ramey Watson

Phillips writes:

If someone hasn’t experienced a toxic relationship with a parent, their first thought is generally, “But she’s your mother!”

As though giving birth renders a woman infallible…
As though “a mother’s love” is guaranteed selfless and pristine…
As though we should sacrifice our mental and emotional (and perhaps physical) health on the altar of the doting daughter…

Mothers are people, too, and while I love mine dearly, there simply came a time when I needed to set myself apart from her in order to grow.

It was not an easy decision to make.

More.

How To ‘Break Up’ With A Narcissistic Parent

Thursday, December 14th, 2017

“Realizing and accepting that you have one or more narcissistic parents is a long and intensely painful road,” Julie L. Hall told HuffPost. “That’s because children, even adult children, continue to desire love and approval, often against all reason.”

Ultimately, asserting low or no contact with a narcissist parent can be a healthy, liberating choice.

“Creating distance with your parent means giving up the delusion that they will someday change and releasing the feeling of responsibility for them they may have instilled in you,” Hall said.

More.

Dads Who Are Staking A Claim In The Parenting World

Monday, November 20th, 2017

While our culture still often treats dads like bumbling babysitters, American fathers are taking a larger role in parenting responsibilities. A Pew Research study indicated that, in 2014, American dads reported spending almost triple the time watching their children than fathers in the 1960s. And millennial dads have been helping to shift workplace culture because they expect to be deeply involved in the child-rearing partnership.

More.

Who Gets to Choose Which Childhood Experiences Are ‘Appropriate’?

Friday, November 10th, 2017

Fom Christina Berchini’s thoughtful article:

Hard as some parents and guardians might try to shield their children from life’s difficulties and cruelties, other students bring adult issues to our classrooms. I certainly did. My students certainly did. An “appropriate” text, then, is also a text that honors this reality. Students who see their experiences ― however difficult ― reflected in the books they are asked to read might be provided with a coping mechanism through literature.

For example, the well-known young adult novel Speak by Laurie Halse Anderson addresses the issue of teenage rape ― a problem that Anderson’s supporters argue needs to be discussed. Children and teenagers lucky enough to live blissful lives ― the kind of lives my colleague assumed to be the rule, and not the exception ― are also served well by texts that illustrate the real trials and tribulations of childhood and adolescence. Such texts help to build empathetic classroom communities with a more complex understanding of the world, whether or not students have personally experienced such complexities.

Thomas Ramey Watson is an affiliate faculty member of Regis University's College of Professional Studies. He has served as an Episcopal chaplain (lay), trained as a psychotherapist, done postdoctoral work at Cambridge University, and was named a Research Fellow at Yale University.

In addition to his scholarly writings, he is a published author of poetry and fiction.

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